therapy for foster parents & adoptive families in KS & MO

You didn't picture it going like this. You knew this road would be hard — but not this hard.

Foster care & adoption are full of hope, love, & longing. But they are also full of waiting, loss, unpredictability, & decisions that were never yours to begin with.

Well-meaning comments often miss the mark:
  • “They’re lucky to have you.”
  • “You chose this.”
  • “Everything happens for a reason.”
  • “You’re so strong. I couldn’t do what you do.”
  • “I’d get too attached.”

But none of that makes this any easier. Navigating flawed systems, overworked caseworkers, relationships with birth families, secondary trauma — this kind of pain doesn't follow a straight line.

There’s no tidy timeline for bonding in this.

You might love your child & still feel utterly lost.

You may want to show up fully & also want to run.

You might be noticing that you're:
  • Overstimulated or like you’re operating on autopilot
  • Enraged at the system, the circumstances, or yourself
  • Lonely — even in a house that’s finally full
  • Carrying the weight of “being chosen” while feeling unchosen in other parts of life
  • Unsure how to bond or afraid that you’re doing it wrong
  • Pressured to “savor the moment” when you’re still figuring out if you’re allowed to exhale
  • Parenting a relative’s child & feeling tension no one else relates to
  • Torn between protecting your child’s story & grieving your own unmet expectations
  • Wondering if you’re allowed to struggle — especially when everyone keeps calling you a hero

Therapy shouldn’t feel like another system to navigate.

& somehow, through it all, life is still moving.
Appointments. Visits. Forms. Milestones. Therapies. Meltdowns.

At Holding New Therapy, we’re not here to force meaning or rush you toward resolution.

We’ll guide you through the unfiltered parts of your story to
  • say what you’re really feeling — even if it feels contradictory
  • explore the losses that came before the arrival, during the waiting, & after placement
  • honor the layered truth of loving a child whose story began without you
  • begin to make space for healing without needing to have it all figured out

This season of life may feel relentless & isolating. You may be grieving a grief that no one's named.

It matters to us. You matter to us.

  • Grieving the child who was reunified
  • Noticing you're disconnected from the one you fought to adopt
  • Coping with the ache of attachment that doesn’t feel mutual yet
  • Processing overwhelm from the paperwork, the system, or the stories you’ve inherited
  • Learning to parent through trauma responses while barely holding yourself together
  • Finding language for your experience when the world keeps misunderstanding it

therapy for foster families & adoptive parents may look like:

feel less alonefeel less alone in the chaos
You’ve been holding so much.
Finding support shouldn’t be one more thing that asks too much of you.

post-adoption depression happens more than you'd think & foster families struggle with burnout at sky-high percentages.

Let's learn how to live with the messiness with more support & compassion for yourself.

ready to start?find support that knows what it's like

We’re committed to making therapy for new parents accessible. All of our sessions are held virtually to reduce barriers like transportation, childcare, finances, location, & mobility needs. If there’s anything we can do to better support your access to care (communication preferences, tech accommodations, website adjustments, etc), please let us know at admin@holdingnewtherapy.com.